Of course psychologists are not satisfied with three letter words to describe relationships, which is where I'm heading. It seems that "manipulate" flows from scarlet tongues much better than "use". However, they're not exactly the same, but complement one another! Manipulating is controlling another utilizing unfair techniques to gain ones way. In short, users manipulate the used to gain control or advantage!
Let's take a look at some historical users:
The serpent used Eve to diminish the authority of God. Eve was naive and the devil, who is "chief of liars", used her naivete to cause her to disobey. The devil gained satisfaction for contaminating God's creation and Adam and Eve lost, among many things, their immortality. The serpent even manipulated Eve to get to Adam!
Aaron was manipulated while Moses was on the mountain in the presence of God. Satan took the opportunity to use the herd mentality of the Jews, who already longed for their sinful lives in Egypt, to use Aaron to create a false god, the Golden Calf.
Exodus 32:1 "And when the people saw that Moses delayed to come down out of the mount, the people gathered themselves together unto Aaron, and said unto him, Up, make us gods, which shall go before us; for as for this Moses, the man that brought us up out of the land of Egypt, we wot not what is become of him.Aaron was weak and he was confronted by a mob! Even after witnessing the many miracles and plagues of God, he "caved" in the face of unrest. The mob manipulated Aaron to obtain their own pleasure! Aaron was "used" by the mob. The system must be balanced! The Jews got their false gods; Aaron lost respect and God was angry with him! There are consequences to being used. Users gain (for a time), but the used lose!
2 And Aaron said unto them, Break off the golden earrings, which are in the ears of your wives, of your sons, and of your daughters, and bring them unto me.
3 And all the people brake off the golden earrings which were in their ears, and brought them unto Aaron.
4 And he received them at their hand, and fashioned it with a graving tool, after he had made it a molten calf: and they said, These be thy gods, O Israel, which brought thee up out of the land of Egypt."
Now let's jump ahead to modern times. Let's look at the "unrest" in Ferguson, Missouri. Just as always, when there is rebellion, the devil is in charge. It's of no consequence that many preachers came to Ferguson to gain personal notoriety, but they were "users".
Those good people who were in Ferguson "used" the situation for personal gain! Michael Brown's death was not to be wasted. As Rohm Emanuel said, "You never let a serious crisis go to waste... it's an opportunity to do things you think you could not do before"! Rohm was saying in effect "use people to get advantage... power!" I believe that the people were standing by to hear the verdict from the Darren Wilson Grand Jury, not to get justice, but to be unjust! The mob was standing by to pillage and steal. They were users and the fair-minded people of Ferguson were the losers!
Let's take a look at what the users gained. They got a few bottles of liquor each and the thrill of watching a police car burn. They saw their own greed on television. That's all that was "gained" from the herd mentality in Ferguson.
The folks being "used" lost much. Black rioters ruined the credibility of peaceful protest. When the nation thinks of Ferguson foremost in their minds are "The Reverend Al Sharpton" there to glorify himself at the expense of civility and honesty. The preacher is a liar and a user! The good people of Ferguson who stayed home and were civil are now represented by the ugly face of Sharpton always there before the camera for personal notoriety. Sharpton is the scum in the ring of the toilet bowl. God has a special place for preachers who are evil!
2 Corinthians 11:13 "For such men are false apostles, deceitful workmen, disguising themselves as apostles of Christ. 14 And no wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light. So it is no surprise if his servants, also, disguise themselves as servants of righteousness. 15 Their end will correspond to their deeds.Justice will be served as the people of Ferguson demand! Al Sharpton will suffer eternal punishment which will correspond to his evil deeds! That's what true justice is! Sharpton "used" and gained (for a time), but in the end the "user" too "loses". Hence, "using" leads to two sets of losers in the grand scheme of things. Divine justice sees to that!
On a personal level, there are users and losers too! Men and women "use" each other in relationships. It's no different than in Eve's time nor in the herds of "the used" elaborated on before. Let's take marriage. It's waning. People, especially men, shirk their responsibility:
1 Corinthians 7:9 "But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn."This passage has a particularly interesting consequence. it is a case of personal justice and divine justice. "Containing" is an antiquated way to say "do without sex". If they lust after a woman (or vice-versa) God says "let them marry"! Millions of men are burning in lust and actually fornicate. They burn in their passion and sin. Divine justice means that they will pay for their passion and their disobedience to shirk marriage! What's more personal justice is that for those men (or women) who claim Christ will "burn with guilt". The "burning" is the emotion of the flesh, but also the eternal burning in hell!
The "user" gains. Sexual lusts are fulfilled. Their "horniness" is taken care of! The relationship is changed from something ordained by God to a mechanical act which can be with our without love.
Who loses? Both again, but more prominently the naive female, in this age, who allows themselves to become merely tools of pleasure for men who know that they never have to make a commitment! The man controls the "used" woman by manipulation (the promise or dream of marriage) in exchange of free milk from the cow, so to speak. The man's lust is diluted by the milk of the cow (in his thoughts).
The woman loses much more. It's not only the loss of virginity, but innocence and self-respect. Their hope is that there is love there, but they can never be sure, because the relationship is confounded. Manipulation skews truth. The woman never knows for sure whether she is loved or are merely a prosthetic for sexual satisfaction. It may lie deeply within, but women always wonder about that even as they allow themselves to be used!
On top of that both parties face divine justice:
1 Corinthinans 6:9 "Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, 10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God."The destination of non-repentant fornicators is the anti-kingdom of God. It's hell! Justice shall be served, just as with Al Sharpton and any other thief, drunkard, rebel, partier, and the like. The "used" shall see justice as well as the "user". In effect sexual gratification for the man has been achieved by extortion. The woman has her body extorted from her by manipulation. She is being "used" by the man for his advantage, even power!
Men need to get a back bone and marry as God tells them to! Men are cowards and liars. If they love a woman as much as they say they do, then they couldn't go one more day without wanting marriage. Their love is to themselves. Their commitment is to their penis's! Men are afraid of marriage because they shirk their obligation to be men! Real men make commitments. Cowards seek reward without responsibility!
When Rohm said "You never let a serious crisis go to waste... it's an opportunity to do things you think you could not do before"! that pertains to relationships as well! The crisis is the woman's desire to be loved and beget children, a biological need! The "opportunity" is for the man to obtain sexual favors without commitment. Women are the "used"!
Feminism is the stated desire for women to become "users" just as men are. They want advantage and control as well! The situation in relationships works both ways as a result, but is still more biased against the female. Feminism is women's desires to use men as they have been used by men. They want to "get in on the action" as the men have always. They want to manipulate and use men, just as they have allowed themselves to be used. In order to gain advantage and power, feminists lower themselves to slaves of their own basic instincts. They debase themselves for advantage and power!
Women, especially, get some self-respect. The self-respect flows out of the used woman as the proverbial milk flows freely. Put a stop now to manipulation. Quit letting suave men extort so called "love" when love is something to flow freely, but in a righteous relationship!