Coping

Life is not always a bed of roses! There are things which go wrong. As a result of wrong things, which may or do happen, people feel spiritually down. It may be a child which makes bad decisions, a friendship is waning,  financial problems, bad health, or a set back in whatever is important. Since life is not "a box of chocolates", but merely symbolic of, as Forrest Gump often pointed out, then some of the chocolates aren't to our taste!

When we cope, it's not full-fledged anxiety and medicine that is needed. It's a normal event. When a person medicates to cope then it's not "coping". When we cope we shield ourselves from whatever is the bother. There are different methods of coping. When I run, bike, kayak or even read; I may be coping with life. I'm shielding myself from ruminating thoughts.

Philippians 4:6 "Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. 7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."

"Coping" is when people must deal with the conversation between the heart and mind. First off, the heart is our inner feelings. It's what is reflected physically as the heart races and blood pressure changes. Part of our "heart" is the emptiness or fullness of the soul because when the soul lacks something or is glad, we feel physically worse or better, respectively. Also, within the heart is our emotions. When our heart is troubled, not only is the organ affected, but so are our dispositions, muscles, breathing, and even our stomach! We are a system and our system all works together in bad or good.

Back to the communication between the heart and mind as spoken of on Philippians 4:7.  The mind controls the heart! It's the CPU which determines how our system reacts! If we're down in spirit when we are disengaged, then engage! That's what sports activities hurriedly do for me: I involve myself with other things to shield my thoughts. Sports works well because it not only effects the mind, but the body. That pit in the bottom of the stomach, at least for a time, goes away when the mind is "fooled". Rather than thinking on dire things, the mind's attention if changed to other things.

However effective exercise is in coping, it's still lacking, because at the end of the activity, what you are coping to overcome is still there! Because a person runs doesn't mean the child will make a good decision. It doesn't mean that the friend will be a strong friend. It is merely a mask put on for a spell so that a person can feel good for a time. That's why it's coping, not altering!

Paul, in the above passages, has a recommendation: "we are to turn to God". Not to undermine God, but he is a great way to cope with life's challenges. It may not be his will that disturbing things go away, but that you can handle what's thrown at you. It's "the peace of God" which nurses the heart of distraught people. We need a way to get that milk to nurse. It's by "prayer and supplication with thanksgiving"!

We all know what prayer is... at least I hope we do! It's merely talking with God, and we're given a model in "The Lord's Prayer". Whatever we pray for, it must be in God's will, for it to be answered. But prayer is more than talking to God. It's trust in his ability to hear and answer bequests. Furthermore, the person praying must listen for an answer, and since God does not speak audibly in this era, we "feel" the answer through that "peace" of which Paul spoke!

"Supplication" is to entreat God to answer our bequests. We are to do that with Thanksgiving. We are to be thankful when he answers prayer, but also when he doesn't for it is his will! When we pray for a mend in friendships there are two outcomes: the friendship will be mended or it won't be. When we pray for a child to make good decisions, that child will either do so or not! The other person still has a free will, and God will lean on them to do what's right, but ultimately it's the responsibility of the other person to change.

Coping is turning the outcome over to God! It's believing that God can change things, but having peace in prayer, that we did our best. It's now in God's hands.  It's not the repetition of the prayer which changes things, but the sincerity of the prayer and the faith in God's ability to influence the outcome. If it's in God's will, he can change stubborn hearts. He doesn't force people to change, but he will set up conditions where change is eminent. That's the peace that we can have to cope with life's turmoils!

James 5:16b "The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much." (i.e., "Prayer changes things!")

Prayer is how we are to cope. Those who pray continually and with fervent desire, are coping with life. They are turning their trials over to God.