Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Blaming... or forgiving? Which?

We call "blaming" "passing the buck". Blame is failing to take responsibility for a person's own actions. We kiddingly say that "blame" is the 5th phase of a 7 Phase Project. Blame is the game. It's not new and it's still the rule, not the exception! Here's the first blame game:

Gen 3: 11 "And he said, Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?  12 And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat. 13 And the Lord God said unto the woman, What is this that thou hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.

Adam and Eve had just eaten of the "Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil". God had forbidden them to do that. God specifically told Adam not to eat of the tree. Look what Adam said... He blamed "that woman", a term even presidents use today!  Then God turned to Eve. What did she say? It's the fault of the serpent!  Did the serpent disobey? No, he deceived her, but she was the deceived. She was the one in disobedience. It's went steadily downhill from there!

Shift gears to now.  A man was seen in the gutters drinking his cheap wine. When asked why, he said "My father was a drunk... what would you expect?"  Another man who was successful in all things was asked "To what do you credit your success?" The man replied My father was a drunk and I didn't want to be like him... what would you expect?" The two men were brothers! One blamed his father for his failure in life; the other changed his destiny because of his father without blame!  Losers blame... winners create their own fame!  Are you a winner or a loser?

Today many people use their parents as the reason that they're dysfunctional. I've heard so many people say "I don't like religion because my parents forced me to go to church!' Let's examine that statement.

What is the responsibility of parents?
Proverbs 22:6 (KJV) 6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
If a parent fails to provide moral and religious training for his children he is guaranteeing disobedience. If he obeys and trains the chid properly the child will be properly trained for life!  Some permissive parents say "I don't want to force religion on my child. I'll let the child wait until grown to decide for themselves!"  Guess what? Permissive parents have just decided their destiny. It is extremely likely that the child will never get proper guidance and make a wrong decision about eternal destiny. The permissive parent just doomed the one they love!
Secondly, parents "force" their children to do most things. Why should "go to church" be any different? I was forced to go to school, I was forced to work in the yard, I was forced to hoe the garden.  I was forced to eat dinner with my family and I was forced to obey my parents in numerous other things. Why is religion so different?
Lastly, parents force their children to go to church so that they will understand what Christ did for them. They would never know unless they're taught, just as the Eunuch said:

Acts 8:30 "And Philip ran thither to him, and heard him read the prophet Esaias, and said, Understandest thou what thou readest? 31 And he said, How can I, except some man should guide me? And he desired Philip that he would come up and sit with him.

That's exactly why we "force" our kids to go to church! "... except some man should guide me!"  We take our children to church to dispel ignorance... to increase their knowledge... so that they may learn what parents know as truth!  We take our kids to church so that they can have hope, yet we're "blamed" because we're good parents!

People just don't take responsibility for their own poor decisions and tragic actions!  When asked why he stole the money a thief said "because it was there for the taking" insinuating that theft would not have occurred if the rightful owner hadn't been so careless, although the carelessness was trusting people! 

There has been much talk of Trayvon Martin. Proponents of continuing the persecution of George Zimmerman blame:

1) The jury was unfair.
2) The judge wasn't impartial.
3) The court were selective in the evidence.
4) The Florida Law is wrong.
5) Society is against minorities.
6) ad nauseum

Anyone's death is disastrous and I was early "blamer" of George Zimmerman!  I didn't understand how a big older security guard could kill a 12-year old kid with snacks coming back from the store. I blamed because I was deceived! The photo shown was of an innocent 12-year old boy. The actual person was 17 years old and a big boy. I blamed because I was told that Zimmerman was a bully who was playing cop. I was told wrong! He was a caring guy who worked with kids including minorities. I was told that Zimmerman was racial profiling. I was deceived by the media. They gave information without full context. I blamed Zimmerman!

Then the facts came out. As Sgt Friday used to say on the detective show Dragnet "Just the facts mam, just the facts!" Facts showed that Trayvon was the bully. Trayvon was the assailant. Trayvon was the drug-user. Trayvon was the one who racially profiled using the word "cracker" to describe Zimmerman. I blamed Zimmerman, but I was wrong. Martin was a victim of unfortunate circumstances, but he was violent with Zimmerman using the sidewalk as a deadly weapon. We need to quit blaming and just say "Trayvon has the same problem as many teenagers do today. He reacted wrongly to a confrontation!" I've reacted wrongly in similar circumstances myself, but I avoided danger. Don't blame Zimmerman. He believed he was proetecting himself from a grown man! Stop the blame game and accept the truth: "Many parents do not bring their children up as the Lord would have them do!"

What's the solution? Do we make more laws which favor one race over another or one sex or another? Do we take away all weapons of protection so that only criminals are armed? Do we void all laws which proetect ourself and our families? The answer is "No!" We are a nation of laws and laws can't dictate love. We have a race problem and there is one cure. Quit blaming! Love one another. It's hard to love the group of people who're always blaming others for their plight! 

Love starts at home. Parents, love your child enough to teach them civil behaviors. Teach your children to be self-controlled. Teach your children to avoid violence. Teach your childrem knowledge! "The word is mightier than the sword!" Above all teach your child the love of Jesus. Jesus is our common ground. Quit "blaming" others for your predictament and even doing it in Jesus" name! 

My child can do wrong! Your child can do wrong! Sometimes we need to quit over-protecting them and let them suffer the consequences of their actions. I'm not speaking of death. I'm speaking of unbalanced parents failing to admit that their kids aren't perfect. I wasn't perfect, far from it, my parents knew it, but still loved me and taught me right!

Was George Zimmerman totally innocent? The jury looked at the evidence and in this case they evidence proved him innocent of all charges. The U.S. Attorney General appears to want an innocent man jailed because he's playing the blame game too! Imprisoning a man found innocent will not restore the life of Trayvon Martin. A Christian should look at this unfortunate occasion to forgive the person who feels badly that a young man died! A Christian doesn't seek revenge. A Christian doesn't blame!

How does a Christian treat an "enemy"? Romans 12:20 "Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head."  You treat your enemy with charity. By doing so you allow God to do the punishing if wrong is involved.

Wouldn't things be so much easier if we quit blaming and accept fact? Sometimes good people do wrong and bad people do good. We all do each. However, in all cases we're to love others as we do ourselves... even those who we perceive has wronged us.

Luke 23:34 (ESV) "And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” "

We are to be Christlike. Jesus forgave those who crucified him. They didn't believe in Him and failed to realize that an innocent man was killed. Jesus didn't blame. He forgave!

Likewise, Zimmerman was just proecting himself. He didn't realize that he was killing a young man, but a strong assailant. He has contrition for the death although it was done in innocence, because Zimmerman "know not what  he did."  Quit blaming means "forgive" Forgiveness is charity. Charity is love. Love is what we're commanded to do... love God, love others... even love those who've wronged us!


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