Although this is a sad commentary on Christianity, it is the sad truth. I've told people "If you could read my mind you'd scream!" I'm not proud of that, but we all have a world inside our head that we wish we hadn't. It must be part of the curse of Adam. I do want to note that the pastor in the story took the sin too lightly. We all sin and repentance is the only cure. It must be real, not sorry that he was caught, but sorry that he sinned, hurt his family and darkened his church and besmirched Christianity itself.
Here's the best example from the Bible of a "secret sin":
2 Samuel 12:9 "Wherefore hast thou despised the commandment of the Lord, to do evil in his sight? thou hast killed Uriah the Hittite with the sword, and hast taken his wife to be thy wife, and hast slain him with the sword of the children of Ammon. 12 For thou didst it secretly: but I will do this thing before all Israel, and before the sun."
David didn't limit himself to mental sins (lust, etc.) . He actually committed physical sins: murder and adultery. He had a plan, planned it well, but God still revealed the sin to Nathan the Prophet. Although David was said by Nathan "thou didst it secretly", God still knew of the sin and revealed it to Nathan!
I think back to my teen years when I tried earnestly to be a Christian, but failed miserably. I sinned in secret, but knew that God knew. It seemed that when I sinned each week the sermon would be on my sin. I thought to myself "This preacher has a direct line to God!" I don't know about my childhood pastor, but Nathan had that direct line!
God knows everything. His power is without bound!
Luke 12:6 " Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God? 7 But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered."
I don't know how or why, but God is omniscient. His knowledge is unlimited. For what reason I don't know, but he knows how many hairs each of us has on our head, and if he knows that, he knows all the thoughts going through our minds!
Psalm 44:21 "Shall not God search this out? for he knoweth the secrets of the heart."
Yes, God knows the mind. There is a direct line between the heart and mind. The desires of the heart are satisfied by the cognition of the mind. Scripture uses heart and mind interchangeably. God knows your desires. God knows your thoughts. Those thoughts which would make another scream in disbelief; God knows those thoughts! Discounting lust for an instant, which makes us sin without actually participating, God sees our physical sins that we do even when nobody is around! We're not "good" by being pure with an audience, we must be pure when alone as well!
I've got this problem. You have the problem and Paul had the same problem! Paul speaking of himself:
Romans 7:17 "Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. 18 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. 19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. 20 Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. 21 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me. 22 For I delight in the law of God after the inward man: 23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. 24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? 25 I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.'
These verses are extremely complicated! Simply put, our desire is not to sin, but we do it anyhow. Paul talks of "the inward man". That, I believe, is the secret sinner! Christians wish to be seen as sinless, especially to God, but inside we know quite well how weak we really are. God understands that! Yes, we're wretched! Our mind wants to serve the Lord, but since we're weak, we sin in the flesh (pleasure). Do we just know this law and accept it as it is? Emphatically, no! We are to have self-control.
2 Peter 1:5-7 (NIV) 5 "For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; 6 and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; 7 and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love."
Our inward man isn't an excuse to sin, but a condition which requires submission to God. God understands, but his understanding is not condoning; it's offering forgiveness!
My desire for me is that my inward man quits secret sinning. My desire for you is the same! I just wish that I was above that, but like you, I struggle as well. That's where it's important for Christians to mentor each other. We are to hold each other accountable. If you tell me that you have a problem with a particular sin, I can ask you on occasion "How's it going with your ______?" Likewise, you can do the same for me.
Let us not ponder the sins of the other, but focus on the obliteration of our own. We're to discard the "beam in our own eye" before we behold the mote (speck)" in anothers. We're to uphold and encourage our brother, not condemn and exploit. One might wonder about me. That's okay, I do too! I wish I could say that I am sin free as some day I will be, but that will be when this body has abandoned its temporal abode. What about you?
My prayer is that our Comforter will provide the full-armor and shield to protect us from evil. He will do that, but our responsibility is the desire to wear the protective armor. The weak link in the full armor of God is our willingness to wear it!
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