Let's take a quick look at that! "Feelings" are being aware of yourself. How you feel is a contributor to your emotions. "Affection" is caring for another. It's a "feeling". The definition of "love" is circular. Really most people recognize love, but it's hard to explain! Is it an "emotion" beyond the bounds of control or is love and the degree of love something that can be guided and changed?
Within the definition of love are different types. I won't go into the Greek, but we have romantic love, brotherly love and love for God. However, love is not black and white. For instance, we may love our spouse romantically which may or may not be sexual. We may love the spouse with care and concern. That's brotherly love. Or we can love the very soul of a mate and care that they not suffer eternal death and that they be blessed by God! A "perfect" marriage is a blend of all three, but nothing is ever perfect! In fact, what is important changes with time. Sex and romance is extremely important initially, but as we grow older, it's the fondness of being friends with each other and wanting a holy alliance to please God because "love" ultimately is our only means of "deserving" eternal life; not that we deserve anything, but that's the way we show God our appreciation for his grace!
The writers of dictionaries aren't necessarily Christians and write from a secular standpoint. For "the world" everything is always about "the flesh". Basically "the flesh" is whatever pleasures the body and mind. "The flesh" neglects the spirit, and thus, the whole has an empty spot inside! What does God say about love?
1 Corinthians 13:4 (ESV) "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never ends."To "love" is being patient and kind, never being jealous nor prideful. Love is never being arrogant nor self-centered. Love is never resenting the other person. Love does not delight when things go wrong. Love is based on truth and trust. Love bears all things! Love believes all things! It gives the benefit of the doubt when there is doubt! It hopes for better things to come and bears patiently until it does.
LOVE NEVER ENDS! It can't. That's what "love" means!!!!
Now look at God's definition. Is there one thing in there that makes love touchy-feely? Is there is one iota of indication that the heart must palpitate wildly or that love is all smooth sailing? Nada. Nothing.
Love is more than emotion. It's a holy demand!!!
John 13:34 "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another."You might rightly say "But that's a 'brotherly love' command"! It is. But, as I said, love isn't black and white. There is much overlap. Along with the brotherly love we look at the romantic side to love:
Matthew 5b ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Ephesians 5:22 "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands."Husband and wife become one and the unit is holy in God's eyes. Whoever seeks to separate the two, even one of them, will suffer spiritual consequences! Why? Because marriage is a picture of our relationship to Christ, as spoken in the last verse!
"Submit" in this context, does not mean that wives becomes slaves to husbands! In context it's the same as for husbands who are to love their wives. Women are to love their husbands! Romantic and mutual love is linked to our love for Jesus Christ. Because we love Jesus, we abide and love our mate. The marriage bond is a holy bond! And I won't even look at the penalty for breaking what God joined together, but it's a terrible sin. True, sin can be forgiven, but don't gamble with sinning with the plan of asking forgiveness, because repentance must be from the heart!
Let's look at the love and hate, God and you:
 |
| Figure #1: Love Circle |
We're to love God first! God's competition is "The Self".(Figure 1 above) It's all the ingredients which makes a man a living being with a soul, and being made in the image of God, we want to be loved. Unlike God who's not encumbered with "self-love" we are. We put the things which please "The Self" above what pleases God! Anytime we do anything in defiance of God it is "The Self" we're worshiping. We are "the other gods besides him". Hence, in the center of the circle are the "Trees" which we can eat from: The Tree of Life (Jesus) or The Other Tree which is us! Adam and Eve didn't bow down to the serpent, they bowed down to their own "flesh". Our love of the things of the flesh is what makes God jealous. We worship what God created (The Self) rather than the Creator.
If that's not true, ask yourself "Do I always put God first?" My answer is that most people always put "The Self" first, and as such are worshiping other gods!
To show that we are worshiping God rather than self, he commands (demands) that we love others and obey what he says! Of course sinful humans, being in love with "The Self" over God, place "The Self" against others as well! This is where God's view of love is important from 1 Corinthians 13:4 above! As we step aside of our "Self" to love God, we too are to step aside from self and love others! And to be like Christ and our relationship to him, it is commanded that we never separate whatever he has joined together!
From God's viewpoint "love" isn't an emotion; it's a duty. He doesn't say to love each other as detected by emotions, but he commanded it. "Love" is a "work"! In God's definition of love it's things you are to do! It's not things you should "feel" which demonstrates love. Love is there even when anger raises its ugly head! Love is there when feelings are hurt. Love is there when opinions differ. Love excels over all things because God makes it possible! It's not an automatic thing, but if one's eyes are focused squarely on God, those things making up love are possible for to God; love is forever!
Now look at Figure #2 below:
Love-hate is a continuum. It's also time dependent. Most people don't "love" all the time nor "hate" all the time. It depends on circumstances and events. In between, as world's collide, "love" can quickly move to "tolerate". After much disgust "love" can move to "I don't care!" Hopefully Christians will never get to the point of "avoid" all the way to "hate" because that is ungodly! God's assignment is to work on relationships to bring that apathetic feeling back to love. It can be done because God tells us to do it; even commands it!
However, our god keeps getting in the way! We take our eyes off Christ and put them on "The Self" and that's just backward!
What a promise if we only humble ourselves! I am truly humbled. I have focused more on God recently and see that love is so important!
When I got married the vowels of the marriage ritual weren't strong enough for me because I wanted my marriage to work. I wrote two pages of specific vowels; ones which would make my marriage stronger from my part. I meant them all. Even when I'm angered or resentful, my love never ceases! Marriage is an imperfect institution even though it's of God because its participants are mere sinners who mess up, get angry, say things best unsaid, and listen to the deception of others.
My son, Jason, when his marriage ended in divorce, had a banner on his wall. It said "Family is Forever". That's equivalent to what God says "Love is forever"! I cried because God couldn't save his marriage because God wasn't called on to save it. His empty house now is sad for me. It's hard to visit there because what once was, no longer is. Satan smiles. He won the battle. However, Jesus will win the war!!!!
 |
| Figure #2: Love-Hate |
However, our god keeps getting in the way! We take our eyes off Christ and put them on "The Self" and that's just backward!
James 4:4 (ESV) "What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? 7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8 Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. 9 Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you."Do you feel stressed about a relationship? Do you fight about things? It's the devil stirring "passions" which "are at war within you". You've been tricked! Satan's job is to destroy what God has joined together, whether it be marriage, families or the church; all spiritual institutions. If we look toward God, we resist those thoughts in our heads, and the devil will flee from you! Whatever ails you right now, if you focus entirely on Jesus, it will go away. God promises that! What does it take to focus on Jesus? We must all look beyond "The Self" and self interests, feelings and strong emotions, planted there by the devil and let Jesus lift us up!
What a promise if we only humble ourselves! I am truly humbled. I have focused more on God recently and see that love is so important!
When I got married the vowels of the marriage ritual weren't strong enough for me because I wanted my marriage to work. I wrote two pages of specific vowels; ones which would make my marriage stronger from my part. I meant them all. Even when I'm angered or resentful, my love never ceases! Marriage is an imperfect institution even though it's of God because its participants are mere sinners who mess up, get angry, say things best unsaid, and listen to the deception of others.
My son, Jason, when his marriage ended in divorce, had a banner on his wall. It said "Family is Forever". That's equivalent to what God says "Love is forever"! I cried because God couldn't save his marriage because God wasn't called on to save it. His empty house now is sad for me. It's hard to visit there because what once was, no longer is. Satan smiles. He won the battle. However, Jesus will win the war!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment