What to Give at Christmastime

I struggle with the entire concept of Christmas. It's a trying time for me. There is just too much stress associated with it. I WANT to be involved with the "Christmas spirit", but it's just not there for me! Why so? Because something in the Christmas spirit is missing; at least from my standpoint. The Spirit is missing in Christmas!

However, there are parts I do enjoy: my family, my friends, good food, decorations, lighting, singing Christmas songs, greetings even from strangers, and so forth. Therein lies the problem! It seems that what I enjoy is all about me! It seems that what others enjoy is at least mostly about them! One thing NOT about me, though, is that I do not like receiving things. I'm just not comfortable with that; not because I'm humble, but that's not the way I was brought up. I get no credit for that!

Most people do enjoy receiving. That in moderation is just fine. For others Christmas is about "What's in it for me?" Even when I take on the air of a scrooge and remove myself from the "Christmas spirit"; it's still about me. I'm doing what I want to do! I don't want to be part of all this stress so I make others uncomfortable because they do want to be part of the spirit. Let's change that from "Christmas spirit" to "Holiday Spirit" because, face it, for society it really has little to do with Christ, even for Christians. We have fallen into the secular trap!

Before I continue with my "solution", let me mention the concept of receiving. I know of no instance in the Bible where it is good to EXPECT to receive anything other than salvation. That is a gift from God which we can't get from others and we don't deserve it!  That means that we don't DESERVE any gift. On the other hand, charity is taught throughout scripture. If it's good to"give" why then is it not good to receive?

It has to do with expectations. For those who expect things, that's sinful. Who gets the charity? It's those who are needy, specifically mentioned are the older widows and orphans. Not even the younger women are to EXPECT getting things!

In the Christmas Story who got the gifts? It wasn't Mary and Joseph! It was Jesus! Why were they given? Because a new King was born. Royal gifts were given, not as charity, but out of reverence to Jesus who DESERVES all that we have to give. His gifts were meant for pleasure, but for honor. (For more on the meaning of the gifts see my commentary Gold, Frankensense and Myrrh).

So I don't have the "Holiday Spirit". Oh, what do I do? I meditated on it and the solution came to mind: I can give to Jesus and at the same time make a partial living sacrifice at the same time. It's not to impress Jesus with gifts, but it is to show Jesus that I do appreciate the hope he gives to me every day. The solution: "fasting". It's from the Old English word faestan and means "to fast". It's a religious duty to abstain from food, but more importantly to "hold fast" from eating. It's being firm in completing the sacrifice and not giving up when hunger sets in.

If one was to merely "fast" until hunger makes it uncomfortable, then it's not holding firm. Since a person who fasts is holding firm from eating, it's symbolic of sacrificing pleasure out of thankfulness for Jesus. We know from scripture that there is power which comes from fasting because some types of sin requires prayer and fasting to be successful:

Mark 9:29 "And he said unto them, This kind (foul spirit) can come forth by nothing, but by prayer and fasting."

What is "the foul spirit" which I want to cast out? It's the "Holiday spirit". I want it to truly be the "Christmas Spirit"!  The solution is not entirely "fasting". Anyone can abstain from food for many reasons. Therefore, fasting must be for the right reasons. It''s in reverence to Jesus! How better to devote your sacrifice to Jesus than to commune with him!

We think of "communion of eating the bread and wine "in rembrance of me" (Luke 33:19). Fasting is done to "glorify God" (2 Corinthians 10:31).  Jesus felt your pain when he allowed Satan to tempt him. At the same time he was tempted, Jesus fasted:

Matthew 4:2 "And when he had fasted forty days and forty nights, he was afterward an hungred."

It took power (and focus) to overcome temptation. Jesus fasted. There is power in fasting! It says after forty days that Jesus was hungry. I bet that Jesus was hungry for the full forty days. He felt what we feel when we do without food. Food is a necessity. It's a basic need and occupies the lower plateau on Maslow's "Need" pyramid. Without food our bodies will give out. We will actually be devoured by our own bodies, striving to scavenge every bit of nourishment which we have stored.

The average person can, with steadfast faith, make it around twenty days without eating, although in extreme cases with no activity that can be stretched upwards to 50 days or so ("Who, What, Why: How long can someone survive without food?"; 20 February 2012; Magazine). Jesus surpassed doubly by what the average man could survive; and he WAS hungry just as we would be! Is it much of a sacrifice, then, to go one day without eating for Jesus?

Now, I have an admission: I messed up! It's out of carelessness because I knew better. I had totally forgotten one aspect of "fasting". It's to be done in secret:

Matthew 6:18 "That thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father, which seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly."

As I said "Holiday spirit is all about me!" It's hard to take the "me" out of Christmas. As I was studying, I remembered that fasting is a secret thing. As such I lose my reward for fasting. However, because I made the commitment to fast, fast I will do! Therefore, I do this without an expectation of a reward. With that said, I suppose this is a "gift" and those who receive gifts don't have to repay with reciprocation. I don't expect God to give me anything in return. I will have peace of mind and a reduction in stress are side effects.

I find it amusing in the difference between the words "feast" and "fast". Take out the "e" from "feast" and "fast" remains. What does "e" stand for" "Eating"!

Fasting is giving of yourself. The regular reader surely knows by now that I believe "other gods" are individual "selfs". How better to honor God than to sacrifice even a little of the "self". People who fast do get hungry. They experience knots in the stomach and some degree of weakness. We need sugar to keep from being light headed.  However, there is another strong urge to eat. It's to provide pleasure to our self. We like to eat. The taste for good food even overpowers the memories of being stuffed to the gills. People eat until they hurt and then continue because of one thing: they like the taste of what they eat!

Satisfying the desires of the taste buds are pleasuring our god. Our god wants good things and we give him or her what is wanted! Our god is appeased by good food and plenty of it! That's why gluttony is a serious sin. It's bowing to other gods, those being our self's.

We eat because our systems detect a shortage of sustenance, because it sooths, because we hunger, out of routine, because we enjoy it and because we have become addicted to good tasting stuff in our mouths! Eating is okay. Anything done in moderation is acceptable as long as it doesn't conflict with God's will. Eating good food is not sinful; overeating is, using food for stress relief is, and being addicted to food is wrong. For one day our body has enough nutrients to sustain us, but we will get out of routine,  and we will hunger. Also, we'll miss the pleasure associated with good food. All those things are the sacrifice in fasting.

Fasting needs to be done in secret as I said. However, prayer does not have to be! Today I'm praying for my children, for the church, for friends and even for enemies. I'm praying for the nation and our leaders. I'm praying for the sick, the lost, the infirm and those living in sin. I'm going to pray for my marriage. I'm going to pray for whatever and whomever God lays on my heart. I guess those will be my best gifts which I give today. Please accept my prayers!

(Because fasting must be done in secret, this won't be posted until tomorrow. So, if you're reading this, it's already tomorrow.)

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Tomorrow Has Come and Gone:

It's now 8:30 am the day after Christmas. Before I break my fast (with breakfast) I want to write with a clear head. I don't want food to impede my thoughts. I started the fast at 10:30 p.m. Christmas Eve and have not yet finished it. I suppose it will last another hour when everyone gets up. Therefore, the duration of fasting will be 35 hours.

What do I feel right this instant before I end the fast?  It's a feeling of accomplishment because the very purpose of the fast was to be successful! "Fast" is holding fast until the goal is met. My goal was to fast for 24 hours on Christmas day as my "food" sacrifice in honor of my savior. The intent was for there to be nothing in it for me. I was wrong; there was much in it for me!

The Fast:

My last meal was 10:30 p.m. Christmas Eve. At that time I had a bowl of Special-K with a banana. My intent was to get a little potassium and some oats for sustenance. At dinner before I had had roast beef, carrots and  potatoes, but no bread. My taste buds demanded some cookies although I was full. It's important that when fasting, more than hunger, it's a desire to satisfy pleasure which is more powerful, at least for a time, than hunger. In fact, as I sit here, it is not hunger which draws me to eat, but the thought of satisfying my taste. Pleasure is who must be defeated because that's how we appease our god of self!

Before the fast started, I had to define the boundaries. I would allow myself beverages. However, it was flavored beverages only and water. I would not even dream of disappointing Jesus with milkshakes nor even chocolate milk. Orange juice, cappuccino and soft drinks were to be allowed.There would be no solid food at all including candies, even hard candies, nor even fruit. The intent is to make a sacrifice and it's my prerogative to establish what I felt would satisfy God. It's my contract with him to do without things I desire to please him. Fasting does please God. Any sacrifice to God is pleasing to him as long as there are not selfish motives behind it.

My motives were clear:

• Celebrate Christmas in the spirit of Christ. To not get caught up in commercialism.
• To give a true gift to Jesus. Myself so to speak.
• To have a harmonious day with all to whom I came in contact. To be in one accord because if the Holy Spirit is to be there, there must be harmony.
• To allow me to be at peace with God rather than stressed out because of others.
• To demonstrate a desire to be reconciled with others.
• To humble myself to God. To do this for God, but not for show.
• To pray for others. I made a prayer list and checked each person off as I went.
• To fulfill the contract which I made to God to be firm (or fast) in my promise to abstain from food. With that said, I knew I would be tempted and I prepared my heart to overcome temptation.

What hindered me:

• Temptation to eat. The good food was there all day long.
• Stomach knots resulting from hunger.
• The lie that Jesus would be satisfied with less that what I promised.
• That others knew I was fasting because fasting should be in secret. Secrecy takes the focus off the "self" and allows it to be on God.
• Routines.
• Satisfying my taste buds.
• The thought that I was wasting my time; that this is merely a small dent which would make little difference.
• That others would think that I was being antisocial or a curmudgeon.

The hardest part of fasting is the "self" part. Rather than to make this "all about me" to make it fully of God. Satan throughout the day kept saying "Larry, this is all about you!" There is some truth to that and Jesus understands that. He is human as well as God! Jesus knows that taking the self out of anything we do is paramount, but the most difficult, and even impossible.

I thought about that dilemma. Jesus to empathize with me, fasted forty days to feel what we humans feel. When he fasted he had numerous temptations. Jesus could have succumbed.  He didn't. Jesus felt hunger pains, weakness and the desire for pleasure. He also had desires for power when it was offered. However, he overcame them for forty days! Therefore, my one day sacrifice is trivial compared to what he did for ME and YOU!

The easy part of fasting is the sleeping part. However, because I had my mind on things and people, I woke up at 4:00 a.m. on Christmas Day. My routine is cappuccino as I read my Bible chapter and write my Herrin Daily Thoughts. This as usual, takes about two hours. So far, nothing sacrificial.

This was to be a day of prayer and fasting.  That was one of my goals since some evil takes prayer and fasting to overcome, according to Jesus. I made a prayer list for the day. It was for specific people and for specific things. I knew that since I would be busy with the rituals of Christmas that I would need to pray as the day went by whenever I could take a few minutes to do so. Therefore, throughout the day I prayed with my eyes closed (some surely thought I was napping). I checked off each person as I prayed for the next.

Because much of the day was spent driving, I spent time praying as I drove. I got behind. Because I had failed to pray through for those on my list, I woke up about 4:00 a.m. this morning and continued to pray for those I'd missed. I did get most of those and added others. You see, my fast was more than a promise not to eat, but a promise to pray with a clear mind!

That brings me to the physical part of fasting. Between 4:00 and 8:00 a.m. I did get hungry. Real hungry. Usually by this time I had only been awake two hours. Now it was four. Breakfast time was what would usually be lunch time. My stomach knotted for about two hours or so. To aid this, I merely drank more liquids. That's a good thing because I usually don't. Liquids help flush the system. Fasting is healthy. We should do more of it for our health!

After a period of knotted stomach, that resided. I'm a little hungry this instant, but for the remainder of the fast, hunger really wasn't an issue. I got over it! I got over part of me!

In college, because I had no money, I ate absolutely nothing for eight full days; not even a slice of bread. I smoked then and didn't even have cigarette money, an even more powerful drive than hunger. After one day, hunger wasn't an issue and after a few days, because food wasn't there, I quit thinking about me and eating. My mind cleared up and I did better with study.

The normal "feasting" process is this:

• I'm hungry. I need food!
• We prepare food and eat. Usually most people overeat every meal. It doesn't take what we consume to nourish us. The balance is for pleasure. It's how we appease our god!
• After eating, most people feel too full and "rest" it off. They are too full to exercise.
• Then people deal with the digestive processes. Sometimes gas and cramps make it painful However, digestive pain is a small sacrifice for our "god".
• After we agonize for hours with "feeders digest", then we feel the pain and agony associated with the need to excrete. Most people even put that off and endure congestive agony for hours.
• Then with congestion, people struggle with the elimination process. Some get "rhoids" from straining. Rhoids must be God's way of punishing our god for over indulgence!
• During this process, since food is mostly water, we must find a restroom somewhere to urinate frequently. Sometimes we wait too long. Pain ensues.
• Before the next meal people get hungry (sic) again. That's really their taste buds demanding attention. Weak people submit to their idol. "Master Bud" (our taste buds) is satisfied with cookies or ice cream and demands more!
• Weak people give their idol more treats. Your idol is just like your dog's awaiting Bacon Bits. Your idol mentally jumps up and down bounding in anticipation. You give your feisty Buds even more treats!
• Then you go through the peeing and pooping process all over again. 
• Before the time arrives, you get hungry (sic) again. Your body lies to you! (You're not truly hungry. Master Bud merely wants more treats!). You submit.
• Then dinner comes. It sure is good! Your idol is tough to appease. It wants more satisfaction. You overeat and give him even more good stuff.
• After over stuffing with starches and meats, Master Bud demands a sweet treat. Your idol always has room for jello; or chocolate brownie, or ice cream or whatever!
• Then the process repeats until bedtime. Some even get up at night and treat Master Bud.
• When times are slow, people contemplate. "I was weak. I overate. I feel bad about it. I shouldn't have done that. I'm going to get fat. I'm ruining my health." And on and on. Satan says "Hogwash... worry about that later!". Then we do. Much later. Never!

What do all these factors have in common? It's all about ME. It's all about YOU. These are the "other gods". Rather than please God, our day is pleasing our self!

You see, this is what fasting is all about. It let's you put aside your other god for awhile and focus on God! When you don't eat, the aspects written above aren't there. Sure we still have to drink and pee, but the stomach goes idle, the taste buds lose their memory and Mr. John is not needed as often. In other words, it ceases to be about ME and YOU and becomes more about God!

As the fast goes on, it gets easier and easier! As I sit here right now, my promised fast has been over for eight hours and forty minutes. That's because eating is not so important right now. I have my mind on God. Likewise, because I'm not eating, thinking of eating, pooping, and hurting; my mind isn't so much on me! I can pray because my idol is ignored and I can think about others more. The result is that I can earnestly pray for them!

Many of my prayers haven't been answered yet, but several have been:

• Two of my dear close family members reconciled on Christmas.
• I made amends to one I loved yesterday and the reconciliation was mutual after three years!
• I was able to handle the stress of Christmas without stress. I was able to tolerate being shut in with dogs for a long period (yes, I have an aversion to that and have had all my life).
• I had an enjoyable day on a day that I normally don't enjoy!
• I had peace about some who overdo Christmas with what I believe to be over-giving.
• My fast was a demonstration to others that Jesus is magnified in this manner.
• I felt accomplished that I fulfilled my promise to God.
• I have hope that I may be reconciled with some others as a result of praying and fasting for them.
• I actually did not intentionally sin for this period and reduced the cases of mental sin. My mind wasn't on me as much.  It was on God.

My fasting was a gift to Jesus on his birthday. As I stated, I didn't expect anything in return! However, look at the list. Look at the number of "I's"! I benefited, and others did too, even though I fasted as a gift to Jesus. Although it wasn't done in secret (that would have been difficult), he still honored me! God doesn't mind ME being satisfied, but the "thank you" must be to him, not to self!

Thank you God for a great Christmas! Thank you for accepting my humble gift... my appetite. I wish it could be more, but that's a start! Hopefully, those around me had more "peace on earth and good will toward me" than they usually do in my presence!