Memories

     Christmas is different; it belongs to the world now. What caused the difference? There are many contributors to losing the meaning of Christmas. This time, I'm not even referring to the best way to worship Christ; I'm referring to family time.
     In years past, there was a patriarch and/or matriarch who was the oldest living member of the family. Ours was Mom and Dad. Christmas, although about Jesus's birth, was focused on honoring Dad and Mom. They did without commencing with the Great Depression which never really ended. Everyone loved and respected my parents. They gave many of our relatives and even strangers an economic start In Indiana as they moved from less prosperous Kentucky.
     Hence, our Christmas was based on the First and Fifth Commandments because we were honoring our Father in Heaven and our parents on earth. We realized that the purpose of the occasion was thanking Jesus for being born to die for us (redemption), and Dad and Mom who lived for their children. Dad and Mom never provoked their children to wrath, and consequently all the children loved them; so much that we would travel hundreds of miles on Christmas to honor them.
     Those reasons for the seasons are lost. At that time, Christmas was about Jesus and family. Not for everyone but for many. Now it's all about people. In other words it is so commercialized that many don't even honor Jesus on Christmas Day! Furthermore, neither are the matriarchs and patriarchs honored. What has divided the traditional family? For many, the search for prosperity. For instance, I have moved state to state twice. Even with that, I always came back home for Christmas because that is where family was. With Dad and Mom departed, that reason is lost. However, I continue the trip most years to be with family. Family bonds keeps traditions.
     Migration for better jobs divides families. I did it twice never realizing what I was losing. My own children never fully got to experience Dad and Mom. They knew them well but failed to comprehend how important the older generation was. We all spoiled Mom and Dad with gifts; nothing expensive, to see the joy on their faces. They had little luxury items in their lives due to poverty, and we all gave many gifts just to see the delight on their faces. They didn't really care for the gifts but the loves which surrounded them. My siblings all loved our parents dearly. They are gone, and that focal point is lost. Thus, younger children need their own patriarchs and matriarchs with whom to share and love. Many younger people have them, but fail to have the same reverence. There again are those two reasons: (1) geographical separation, and (2) blended families.
      Before I moved around, I never realized the consequences of migration. I separated my kids from their matriarch and patriarch. That cost me too fold: (1) they never had their example, nor (2) appreciated grandfatherly and grandmotherly types of love. Neither have my own grandchildren for the same reason. Although a recent great-grandfather, I still am not a patriarch because patriarchs sit on the family throne and distributes love for love on return.
     My job caused me to even miss being a good father. Corporations care little about the family. When my children were young, I often worked seven twelves plus overtime. General Motors robbed my family life. I traded love for prosperity not realizing that God would have taken care of me if I had changed jobs. It's too late for me now, but career isn't everything! I also learned that promotion means little. I longed for promotions in my early years but after moving twice, I turned down a total of eleven promotions, most from one state to another. I didn't want to disrupt my children's lives again nor  separate myself from them. With poetic justice, vocations and the search for good pay stole all my children from me. They all moved away. I lost my patriarchy because of economic reasons.
     The other most terribly divisive tactic in the Devil's toolbox is blended families. Specifically, those blended by divorce. I consequence of divorce is a divided family. The division is seen  most horribly on Thanksgiving and Christmas. As we try to honor Jesus, Satan laughs at all the chaos he caused with blended families. Divorce separates families, and remarriage blends them. Nowadays children have six, seven, eight, or more "grandparents". Some of them are not even blood related. Patriarchy and matriarchy is lost with divorce and remarriage.
    Before divorce became so rampant, families generally lived in the same proximity. The family would visit my parents for dinner, and her parents for supper. That was because people dis not massively move all over the U.S. for jobs. Families were more important than a minor promotion and a few dollars more! I mad that mistake; it was indeed a huge mistake. Besides God, families are the greatest gift anyone can receive on Christmas.
     I miss traditional Christmas. I am supposed to be elated on Christmas day. That is difficult because the best gift would be the presence of my siblings and children. Sure, I can travel to see them, which I most often do, but it would be fantastic if I could be in my home with those I love the most. We came to Grandpa's house for Christmas; everyone did. We all knew where we were going and to whom we were honoring. Now, few even know where they will be at Christmas nor with whom they will be, if anyone at all!
    I dread Christmas. Macy's, Walmart, and Best Buy love Christmas for the same reason I dread it. They are honored, but I don't believe that presents are the way to honor. At Christmas I care little for the materialism. It can never replace love and honor. To be truthful, I am not as honored by a trinket or clothing little compared to three words: I love you.
     Jesus received three presents at his birth. It wasn't the gifts which honored him but that he was honored. The magi traveled hundreds of miles probably on camels to honor Jesus - THE Patriarch of mankind. The gifts were not really gold, frankincense, and myrrh bit honoring his Supremacy (Kingship), his life (ministry), and his death (suffering). Those wise men knew that that Jesus would only be around for a short time, and came to honor his death at his birth. The tradition for Christmas, of course, should be on honoring Jesus together. There is power in unity, and how much more powerful it would be if families were in one accord with the focus on Jesus!